Nothing can give you the cold slap of the reality of what age you are quite like being surrounded by young people.
My fiancé and I went to see Fall Out Boy at the weekend. I found out about Fall Out Boy when I was about fourteen/fifteen years old but I loved their new album and had to see them. They were great but the experience has left me feeling a little shaken. Particularly when seeing the support act: The Pretty Reckless. I have never realised I was, dare I say it, old!
I was shocked. Here was me thinking I was some hip, cool, young thing that could boogie better than the rest of them. Alas, I was mistaken.
To ease the pain for you when you, I’ve pointed out some of the tell-tale thought which mean you are officially an old-fart:
- You there. Yes you. On the stage. Stop moving around. You’re back doesn’t bend like that and you are making me dizzy.
2. You, young child, are sitting in my seat. Don’t look so petulant. Just because you aren’t old enough to read does not give you the right to sit wherever you damn well like
3. Oh my goodness. Someone help that woman! She’s screaming! Why is no one helping her?! Oh wait, she was trying to do that? As part of the song?
4. Strobe lights have only to be used when you have crashed landed and need to use them to seek help or to signify lightening at the pantomime. Having them in every song is attention seeking and it is giving me a sore head.
I know a full-time job, mortgage and engagement are probably other tell-tale signs of getting older but I thought I was hiding it better than this.
Enough of this computer malarkey. Someone find my slippers and make me a cup of tea.